Cancer Diaries V: The Blood Must Flow

In general, I feel very lucky at how this whole "having cancer" experience has gone so far; others, including some folks I know personally who are Going Through It at the moment, have it way worse.

That said...

Could SOMEBODY have maybe warned me that I would be firing chunky blood bullets out of my dick a few weeks after the operation? I swear, in all the documentation, phone calls, visits, etc., I've had about this goddamned surgery, never once did "oh uh the surgery scabs inside of you where we sliced out an organ? those gotta leave you somehow, and since they involve the piss tube to begin with, guess how..." get brought up.

I am annoyed.

You know why? The one thing a recently-operated-upon person does not want is A Surprise. Recovery had been generally following the plan as described to me beforehand; often unpleasant, but expected. I can deal with that.

What I struggle to deal with is getting up to take a normal-assed piss (something you do not appreciate enough until you've been unable to do so for a few weeks) and feeling an utterly new sensation racing down my dick. I am 52 goddamned years old. I in no way want novel sensations in my cock region at this stage of life. Said sensation was then followed by a scene that would've made a pretty good Cannibal Corpse album cover and lyrical inspiration.

That scene has repeated itself more times than I am at all comfortable with in the days since. With that stated, it is also insanely and repeatedly surprising to me what the human body/mind can get used to. The first time it happened, my reaction was "AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGHGHGHGHG WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK". A few times later, it was "pissin' marinara again. sigh" in a tired but otherwise-unperturbed tone.

May this please be the last novel physical experience I have to be subjected to for at least a few months.